i’ve been resisting this for awhile, this hollow in my belly. the inner nag that whispers, “do something.” DO SOMETHING. even if it’s wrong. (not really.)
& i’ve got my well-rehearsed list of why-i-can’t-right-now.
i have three kids. i’m homeschooling them. i’m expecting. i’m in my third trimester (read, tiiiiiiiiiiiiiired.). we’re trying to move, which means i’m trying to pack up unnecessaries & form them into a garage sale. i have three kids. did i mention that i was tired? AND i have three kids.
still, the nagging never ceases.
i heard a sermon this weekend about the river jordan, joshua & his crew, crossing that flooded river into the promised land. “have courage,” ye little ones.
on the way home, huz & i were talking about the strands that sermon brought out of us. our oldest wanting to go to summer camp (ahhhh! already? are you out of diapers?). & after we traversed that foreign landscape awhile, huz said to me, “starting a blog is another river you need to cross.”
why is it that the best people in your life are always the ones to level the most difficult advice? yeah, i suppose i should. i have a degree in creative writing. i have loved the written word since the first journal i wrote in on the way home from the dentist when i was six. i proofread BECAUSE IT’S FUN. i read cereal boxes because those are the words sitting in front of me in the morning. & most importantly, what he said spoke to a place deep in my heart that’s been hanging out, a little rusty, a bit dormant.
but putting yourself out into the world is a bit more frightening than creatively crafting a to-do list (which i thoroughly enjoy.). i could sound dumb. i could write stupid things. people may think i’m a fool for writing down words & shooting them out into cyberspace. (what, am i, in 7th grade again?)
ANYWAY, what this boils down to at the bottom of the pot is an effort to listen to who i am. & who i’m intended to be. who the Creator wrote me down for when He called me into being. & that, as it always has been, has to do with words.