the right mom.

i’ve got a morning ritual now.  i set the alarm on my phone, wake up to some funky, froggy song, & after hitting snooze two or three times, i get up to read scripture & do a little journalling.  then i read blogs, & if i’m still the only one awake, i write here.  it’s a quiet, before-the-house-wakes bit to sort out the brain files, the battles fought in the night, to stand me up for the day.

this morning, my girl was up five minutes after i sat down, wandering through the door in tinkerbell jammies. i still wanted my time, so i told her to get a pillow & a blanket, her markers & some paper.  i read a few more minutes, & then my little one treaded in, bleary-eyed, to crawl in my lap.  i kept reading, rubbed his soft little back, let him snuggle as best he could over & around his sibling inside me.  i felt the frazzled strain between my routine getting shafted & wanting to be a good mommy to my innocents. i had residue left in my belly, knots & twists to work through.

out of nowhere, little one looked up at me, still perched on my belly, & said, “you’re the right mom.”

some hard shell cracked.  pieces chinked off & fell to the floor.  i heard my insides breathe a sigh of relief, where i didn’t even know i was holding my breath.

my next thought surprised me, “yes, yes i am.”

i hadn’t been second-guessing my mothering exactly, but that little vote of confidence, so self-assured & matter-of-fact sent lifeblood up my spine.  slowly, the frazzle faded, the clouds cleared.  i could stand up straight & look into the day with a fresh brain.

am the right mom, because i am his mom.  their mom.  & nobody can do this job like i can.  i was meant for this job.  for these moments.  for this space early in the morning when they’re awake too early & i can’t yet see straight.

it’s the same for you, no matter your vocation.  you are the right mom, or the right dad, or the right office manager or the right friend.  you are the right daughter, the right son, the right teacher, the right farmer.  you are the right one, because you are the one meant to do what you’re doing.  nobody can do it exactly like you can.  nobody can speak the words you can, or do the tasks you’re meant to do.

today, do us all a great service, & be the right one, whoever that is for you.

nobody else can do it like you can;  we need it from you.

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